Sunday, 2 September 2012
I Still Have All My Own Teeth. I Never Throw Anything Away.
I went to the Dentist on Friday. I needed to have a filling. I never have those gum numbing injections, because I am such a brave strong hero I don't need any help to deal with pain. The Dentist told me I was very brave, but he never gave me a lollipop. I don't think they do that anymore. Give out lollipops I mean. It might be because doing so would rather defeat the object. Bloody killjoys. Look mate if we all had perfect teeth you would be out of a job for a start. The way I see it is if I can't have a lollipop what's the point of being brave?
It is very odd the way Dentists always stuff your mouth full of cotton wool before they ask you a question. I think they do it on purpose. They aren't really interested in the answer. He asked me if it hurt as he was drilling into my tooth cavity. Do you know what I said? I said, "mmmnnpphhmmn naanmmph nnaahhss." Which caused him to drill harder. What I was trying to say was, "Not much, but it is making my toes curl."
My next appointment is in six months time. I am so looking forward to it. There are two reasons for this. One is that I can't wait to have another conversation with him, and the other is because if I keep the appointment, it means I am still alive at age sixty five and a half, and still have teeth. That might be three reasons actually.