Tuesday, 24 July 2012

Everything Gonna Be All Write.

Today I have been mostly sitting in front of this very screen, recalling and writing harrowing tales of an abusive childhood. I have at times brought tears to my own eyes, and wondered how on earth I survived it. I have struggled to remember anything that I could use to add some humour to what will otherwise be a very miserable read.

I am sure that I did laugh occasionally when I was a child, but have sadly concluded, for today at least, that I was a quiet, introverted, somewhat reclusive, and unhappy child.

This book writing is not as easy as I thought. There are some things that are not easy to speak of. At least by someone of my generation. We were not so open as the kids of today are. It is I think, in the nature of us immediate post war kids not to talk of unsavoury things. But to hell with that! I am going to tell it like it was.

As I was driving my extremely handsome son George to the railway station today, it occurred to me that perhaps I should talk to him about the content of my book. Prepare him, as it were for the shocking truths I will be revealing. I think I will do that. When I can find the resource inside me to say things out loud, instead of simply writing them down. Simply? Hah!

It is past midnight. I am all written out for the moment.

11 comments:

  1. Humor is a sense we carefully cultivate through life and recounting some experiences can severely test its strength. On a lighter note, let me congratulate you on the name you chose for your son. --Geo. (George)

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  2. I have been going to comment since I read the pages from your book yesterday but I am finding it difficult to form a response. I am concerned that as you delve back into your memories you will unearth things that will disturb and upset you. Although I can appreciate that this can have a cathartic effect, its a hard thing to go through alone and I think you need the support of loving friends and family around you. Things that were hard to live with at the time are going to be hard to re-visit now. I feel sure you will get support from your gang of 71 but we are not there in 'real life' to give you the hugs and care you may find you need.

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  3. John, it might be a good idea to share some of your burdens with your son. Obviously, you have been thinking about doing that.

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  4. By all means - - keep writing!
    Writing is a great catharsis and a beneficial emotional outlet. I had an unhappy childhood, too. My father was violent and extremely abusive. It took a lifetime to forgive him for nearly destroying me. Strangely enough, after he died all of my hate vanished.

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  5. Definitely discuss this with EHS George. He will find it enlightening to find out more about your childhood. Maybe he can help proof read. Then neither of you will feel isolated about the topics of the book. As a post war baby myself, I can talk to my children about anything except my personal feelings. Maybe a copy should go to your daughter when it is finished. An understanding of your childhood might clarify her thoughts about things too.

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  6. Better out than in I always say. You are challenging yourself to get it out and I feel that has to be healthy. I do agree with a fellow commentor that you do need some love and support from those around you. All I can do from across the oceans is to send cyber hugs and let you know that am interested in your journey. By the way: 71 followers, what happened? You've jumped past 69 very smartly.

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  7. It did me good to write about the past and in particular about my mother. Keep at it, John. It's difficult recalling dark moments, difficult and sometimes heartbreaking but you will reap the benefit in the end. You will find the right time to talk to your son, let it come naturally. (((John)))

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  8. It is hard to do what you are doing but as many say it will help you in the end. I am writing my story now and then not all in one hit but I have got stuck on the bit that was the most upsetting part of my life. Maybe one day I will be brave enough to share it . I think you should prepare your handsome George.

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  9. For what it's worth. Explain to the EHS George what your book is about, WHY you feel compelled to write it, that you don't want sympathy,you don't need permission but you 're telling him because you love and respect him and know you won't be judged.
    Or something like that.
    Jane x

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  10. Great to hear that your book is in progress. So brave of you to pen down those bitter past and shared it with the public. At least it gets of your chest and maybe help another soul who is or had experienced the same bitterness. Can't wait to get a copy of your book when it is done. Happy writing.

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