Monday 30 July 2012

A Reasonable Chance Of Reaching Sixty Five.

It is flipping exhausting getting ready for the party. It will be worth it though. It's quite a momentous thing reaching 65. If I reach it! Still a few days to go yet. Anything could happen. I could get run over by a bus for instance. Just imagine that.

Wouldn't it be awful if I dropped dead just a few minutes before my 65th birthday? After all the work I have put into preparing for the party too. I say it would be awful, maybe it wouldn't be. I have no way of knowing, never having had the pleasure of meeting anyone who has experienced what it would be like to drop dead just before a 65th birthday.

I would never forgive myself if it happened to me. I'm hoping to get my money's worth out of my old age pension. And my new suit! Anyway I shall try to avoid that happening, and I shall most certainly take great care if I see any buses next Saturday. Especially the number 700 bus that passes by here. It was a number 700 that knocked me off my bike, just a few hours before my 50th birthday. I could easily have died that day. I was lucky that time though and landed on an old mattress someone had dumped in the hedgerow at the side of the road. As the old saying goes: It's an ill wind that never blows any.... It's an ill wind that blows hardest.... It's an ill wind that has never.... When the wind blows ill there will be.... If the wind is ill never.... There is an old saying but I can't remember it. Anyway I'm not going to push my luck.

If you don't hear from me after next Saturday don't worry, because my actual birthday is on the Sunday, and we don't have a bus service round this way on Sundays.

If you haven't heard from me by the following Sunday, it will only mean one thing: My computer is playing up. Or, make that two things: They introduced a Sunday bus service!

I'm going to stop talking like this now. I might be tempting fate. Come to think of it, I do feel a bit unwell.

16 comments:

  1. This makes me wonder...have you been playing "When I'm Sixty Four" on your guitar this year? You better hurry up!
    And hey, Happy Birthday next Sunday, and stop worrying about buses!

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  2. Just make sure your insurance is up to date....your blog friends as beneficiaries....we'll take care of the party!!!!
    Jane x

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  3. The expression,"run over by a bus", has no basis in fact. Oh sure, some have got knocked off the odd bike but no one has ever really been run over by a bus and if you manage it you'll foul up a perfectly good euphemism. What shall we say then? I hope I don't fall into the path of a glacier?

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  4. Be sure to get plenty of rest on Saturday so you can let loose and party like hell all day Sunday.
    I hope you have a wonderful 65th birthday - - with no buses in sight!

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  5. RELAAAAAX...everything is going to turn out just fine! Enjoy your party and company, who knows how the night may end!! ;)

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  6. After your 50th experience it would be advisable to keep your bike in the shed. Have a great 65th!

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  7. No worries, I ordered that bus-free Sundays should continue. Did it by fervent prayer... like my fervent prayers are listened to... grins. Anyway I hope Saturday turns out to be the biggest rave-up you ever had. My thoughts and good wishes will be there on time.

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  8. If you don't make it to 65 then I may have to start worrying for myself. I want to be 81 at the least. I have always wanted to be a crotchety old 81 year old that just says whatever comes to mind.

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  10. Just a thought, there could be another reason that you wont get back to us, your loyal readers. You might get LUCKY with a lady and be in a heavy session of her oiling up your thong clad bod. Have fun.

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  11. John, you should not only stay away from buses and not bike ride but maybe just stay home and work on the party preparations. But then where would the fun be? Happy early 65th birthday wishes, not quite there myself, so you can try it first.

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  12. Happy 65 hope you make it:) just kidding there are lots of mattresses lying on the road waiting I think. B

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  13. Beatrice has a good point. Maybe you should just stay home and inside until your birthday.

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  14. I feel like that before every party, no matter what age I am. My only consolation is that if I dropped dead after all the preparation, I would never really know. Enjoy the party anyway, if you survive that long :)

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  15. But what if that run-away bus was driven by a tribe of Amazon women who were lusting to please a pensioned British gent in every way he could imagine????? You would never forgive yourself for "missing the bus". Happy Birthday early. I will be watching how you handle 65 as I will be there in 2 short years. Being a burden on the Pension System I have been doing for 12 years now. It's great.
    Grenville

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  16. But what if that run-away bus was driven by a tribe of Amazon women who were lusting to please a pensioned British gent in every way he could imagine????? You would never forgive yourself for "missing the bus". Happy Birthday early. I will be watching how you handle 65 as I will be there in 2 short years. Being a burden on the Pension System I have been doing for 12 years now. It's great.
    Grenville

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