Tuesday, 27 December 2011

Bonnie The Cat And The Unwanted Gift.

Bonnie the cat was pleased with the tin of sardines which I gave her for Christmas. She must have felt guilty that she hadn't got me a present, because she went out to find me something. As touching as her gesture was I really wish she hadn't bothered.
It was peaceful in the wagon that night. I had enjoyed my time in the house, with everyone, but now it was time to relax on my own, beside the fire, happily whittling a stick, whilst dreaming of selling a piece of artwork for a vast amount of money. Well I did say dreaming!
In my mind I wondered why Bonnie was making such a noisy job of coming through her cat flap. Idly I considered the idea of getting up from my chair to find out. Sadly the idea was still in the considering stage when she finally made it through. She had brought my gift home, and purring proudly, she dropped it by my feet.

The rat and I looked at each other in astounded surprise!

"Live and let live, Guv'ner. Live and let live".
Bearing in mind that the wretched creature had just been pounced upon, captured, and dragged into the wagon by a cat, it was perhaps, not surprising that I was the first to react to the situation.

My wild, mistimed kick, missed the rat entirely, and due to the fact that I had a sharp knife in one hand and a stick in the other, which I had to put down carefully, the rat was able to scuttle away.

I found it cowering under the kitchen sink, and all I could think to do, was to pick up a boot and throw it at the unwanted visitor. Again my aim was bad, but I was quite surprised to hear the rat squeal in fright, before it ran through the living area and into the bedroom. Bonnie took exception to the flying boot and took off, through the cat flap and out of harms way. Probably pondering on why I was reacting in such an ungrateful way to her generous gift.

Some regular readers may be aware that my wagon is not finished on the inside, hence there are no doors fitted to separate the various rooms. Which is how the rat ended up in the bedroom, under my bed. The bed is built in. There was no way I could remove the rat from under it. After a couple of minutes poking about with a stick, and shouting loudly, it became obvious that Mr Rat was not going to be bullied into moving from his place of safety. I retired from the fray and sat down to contemplate my next move.

After a while the rat, obviously thinking that the silence, meant security, poked his whiskered face around the door frame. Seeing me, he quickly scampered back under the bed. However I had now formulated a plan of action.

My plan was quite simple. It was, as luck would have it, a mild night. There was no wind, and no rain. I would leave the wagon door ajar all night. When all was quiet, the rat would be able to make his escape.
But how would I know if he, or she had actually left?

This is where I like to take a bit of time out and say a small prayer of thanks to the Almighty for giving me the gift of ultra intelligent brain power! Without this phenomenal intelligence I would not have been able to hit upon the solution to my problem.

What I did was, I sprinkled a layer of flour on the floor, directly across the area the rat would have to traverse to make his escape. Simple but ingenious! If there were little footprints in the flour I could be confident the little rodent had made good his escape.

In the meantime, where would I sleep? Well, let me tell you, it would take more than a rat to keep me from my bed!. I will admit that I took a flying leap onto the bed, so as to avoid the likelihood of having my toe bitten by an angry rat. But after a few minutes trepidation, wondering if it might get into bed with me, I soon fell asleep.

In the morning, my furry visitor had left. Here is a photo of his footprints to prove it.

I am pleased he got away without further incident. I have always greatly admired life's survivors.


  1. Mice I can deal with.. but rats!!!!
    Jane x
    PS Will you be on this year's "Bravery Awards" list...because if you are I'll need a frock and a posh hat.

  2. Boy o boy! Bonnie brings you large and live presents and you react with wild antics and dribbling of foodstuffs on the floor. No wonder she was confused.

  3. Oh I am so glad my cat does not come bearing gifts like that. I couldnt cope, its the tails, I really dont like rat and mice tails.

  4. Well there is now way I would have ever been able to fall asleep with such a gift hiding under my bed.

  5. Cats! How can you love 'em? I doubt that I could have fallen asleep.

  6. I was absolutely certain that when you left the door open the rat's whole family and next door neighbors would come for a visit.

  7. What would you have done if those footprints hadn't been there in the morning?

  8. How thoughtful of Bonnie. A traumatic experience. You seemed to have coped admirably. Well done guv'ner!

  9. Our pets are so generous, aren't they? I think you might have shown some gratitude after all the effort of catching the rodent .....grins. Me, I would have ... erm ... Hmmm ... still thinking about that one.

  10. Johnm you must certainly be glad that Bonnie only stopped at one present, which was certainly more than enough. That was an ingenuous and quite clever trick with the flour.

  11. Flour? Damn, you are smart!