Friday 27 May 2011

Calm Down Ladies. The Love Machine Is Switched On Ready To Go.

Did I mention to you that I was thinking about joining a dating site? Yes I must have. I share everything with you. Well I've done it! Girded up all my inner strength and done it. It's true. I am now a member of a dating site. Success is guaranteed on this particular site apparently. Which means sadly, that I am going to be extremely busy juggling dates with all the women who view my profile. I say sadly because obviously there will not be a lot of time left in which to blog.
Lovemaking, in my opinion is something not to be rushed, and I expect to be doing a lot of it soon. My gym membership has been renewed. I intend to be in peak physical condition for each and every one of the beautiful women who are sure to come lusting after me. After all I do think it is only fair to give equally of my time to the hordes of lonely ladies who once they have viewed my portrait, will come knocking on the wagon door, in a feverish sweat of excited anticipation.
I intend to limit myself at first. Not more than two women each day. Best to build up to things slowly. No need to be greedy. As I say this site does guarantee success. So there will be lots to choose from.
I am so excited! Just think. Me! About to fulfill the dreams, hopes, and aspirations, of so many lonely ladies.
I have always felt that my unselfish, generous, and modest nature would come in useful one day. This is why I dwelt on it a lot, as I was writing my profile notes for the site. Sure to be hard for the ladies to resist.
Hopefully they won't be too disappointed when they arrive, and discover that the picture I have used is not actually me, but one of Clint Eastwood. I'm sure they won't be. After all if the truth be told I am better looking than him anyway. The only reason I used his photo is because it is of a better quality than I was able to get on my camera. Besides that, we do both wear hats. Also I have told a little white lie and said that I am over six foot tall. This shouldn't be too much of a problem though. I am going to explain that I have very short legs for my height.
Okay then. I am going off now to check my inbox. Probably have to delete a few messages without reading them. Wouldn't want to crash the system by letting it get overloaded. They'll come back though. Who could resist me?
When I first started on this article I mentioned that I shared everything with you. That is no longer true I'm afraid. I am a gentleman. Well maybe not always if you get my drift. But some things must remain a secret. I'll keep you informed of course I will. Just not absolutely everything. Hmm.. Better get the bedroom tidied.

6 comments:

  1. I hope you have the strength to write a post now and then just to let us know that you haven't worn yourself down to nothing. As far as your picture of Clint Eastwood, I trust you used one of him when he was young. He has not aged as well as some of us.

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  2. I can't wait to read about all your "dates".
    Dang...I like Emma's comment.:-D)

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  3. Me gusta la foto de los huevos !! ;)
    Gracias por tu visita.
    Saludos des de Catalunya
    Anna

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  4. It sounds like you are going to be one busy guy. I hope all your dates look as good as the profile pictures they post :)

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  5. Well you must be irrestable because if you haven't noticed, you have mostly women followers here. So hopefully you won't be leaving us for all of those other women.

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  6. Thanks for all your comments ladies. I promise to stay faithful to you all. Gosh! It's not going to be easy though. :-)

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