Monday 20 August 2012

What Is Your Best Position For Doing It?

I am going to be honest here and tell you that it has been quite a long time since I last did it. The last time I tried was about six weeks ago, and I'm ashamed to say I never managed it. So disappointing. Anyway last night I decided to give it another try.

What a carry on! You should have heard all the moaning and groaning. I tried it in as many positions as it is possible to get into at my age, but still  no luck.

At one stage I got a bit hopeful though. I had one foot on the floor and the other one on the bed, and got quite excited when I very nearly did it, but in the end I had to give up again. It was beginning to hurt and I was getting short of breath.

This state of affairs cannot be allowed to continue. I have decided to swallow my pride and seek help. I know of a very nice woman in the village who specialises in this sort of problem. I have asked her to call round. She is not a professional, but my mate Barry, who was having the same problem as me, is very satisfied with her.

She is coming tomorrow morning at 11 o`clock. I can't wait. It will be such a relief to finally get my toenails cut!

It is a lack of suppleness that is my main problem. Well that and being ever so slightly overweight. I am going to start taking Limbo lessons. I read recently of a man who has done Limbo all his life, and at 105 years old he can still get both feet behind his neck. Remarkable! I would like to be able to do that. I mean around my neck, not his. That would be silly.

Not Limbo. I mean Yoga. What am I like?






10 comments:

  1. John, you are awfully cheeky...thank goodness I figured out what you were talking about before I read to the end, if not I would most certainly be appalled.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I do mine in the bath lying on my back, just lift my knee up. I sometimes stand on the bathroom floor with one foot up on the edge of the bath, that makes it a bit easier. And always cut them after you have soaked your feet, the nails will be nice and soft then, much easier.

    ReplyDelete
  3. They say if you don't use it, you lose it. Yoga is good, can't have the old boy rusting up, now can we!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I've always been super supple...good job you don't paint your toenails too..unless the lady from the village will be doing that for you!
    Jane x

    ReplyDelete
  5. I used to be able to put both my feet behind my head just for fun. I could climb things too, trees, ladders, mountains and cut my own toenails with ease. These skills have gone but others have replaced them. I can now stand at a checkout and pay for my shopping with the correct change and completely ignore the grumbling and tutting behind me from the people who would prefer me to pay with a note or by card. This is a real old lady skill and hey I am an old lady.......... OK maybe not a lady haha.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I am a most ungraceful, clumsy person. I was never good at gymnastics or that sort of thing. I did not inherit my mother's limberness. She could put her feet behind her head with ease... for her entire life. Some things just are not fair.

    ReplyDelete
  7. you have the most interesting way of telling a story. :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. My athleticism is confined to running and biking. Not as flexible as I used to be but seem to still manage it. The toe nails I mean!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Why do men seem to have such a hard time with their nails? I have to cut my husband's also. In all fairness he was born with club feet so they don't bend the way he wants them to. The only way we can do it is by him lying on the ground and me on the chair tugging and pulling (on his feet!) The worst part is when a piece of nail takes off and hits me in the face like shrapnel.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hahahah you really got me here. Shame on me for thinking of ............ Ahem. You really are good in writing. Thanks for sharing. Your blog never fails to brighten up my day. Happy blogging and doing, have a nice day.

    ReplyDelete