Tuesday, 4 October 2011

When Is A Shed Not A Shed? When It's A Gate.

I have been busy this past couple of weeks on a new project, and I thought I would share the fruits of my labours with you.
What happens when I become enthused with something is that I allow it to take over my life. That's what has happened here, and I have been working on this project from early morning to late evening. Which is the reason why I have not done a lot of writing lately. Although the writing I have done, is, as usual, to such a high calibre that no one has been left wanting in that respect. Not that I would ever be so immodest as to actually say that. As you know by now, I am a very humble man, and take extraordinary pride in my humility.
So I hear you ask, what have I been up to? Well I hope you are ready for this revelation. I have made.. wait for it.. wait for it.. I have made a gate!
Now you see it
Yes, I thought that bit of exciting news would make you sit up and take notice. Not only have I made a gate, but it is in fact three gates in one.
Another way through.
Yes I know. I can hear your brain cells ticking over. Not only is he ever so humble, but he is a genius too. Well it is very kind of you to think about me in those terms, and thank you, but really it was nothing. Anyone could have done it. Provided they possessed the same genius as me that is. But I wouldn't ever say that of course. I'm a humble man.
Now you don't
I found this old 1950's milk bottle buried in the undergrowth.
Trompe l'oeil gate.
Side gate open.
Here it is then, the gate. I have just realised that there are actually four gates in one. By the way, that shed you see there is not really a shed. It is actually the main gate. The white picket gate on the left is not really a gate, it is a paint effect known as trompe l'oeil, which means to deceive the eye. It is painted onto the real side gate, which is also painted to look like what is behind it. I'm confusing myself here. The yellow door in the middle is real, and also opens. So there you have it, four in one. Here are some more photos.
The little milk bottle was found whilst George, my extremely handsome son and I were clearing the ground. I gave it a clean up,  filled it with white paint, and made a tin foil cap for it, the bottle is glued to the window sill with aruldite glue, which is very strong. The cap is also glued on.
All materials used in this project, are reclaimed, and cost nothing, except for the leaded window, which I bought from a friend. Huh, some friend, eh?
There is still lots of clearing and tidying to do behind the gate. The eventual aim is to create a space to display my work and open as an outdoor gallery.
Here is a confession. It has taken me ages trying to get these pictures in the right places on the page. This is the best I can do with them. So you see, I am not really a genius, but I am humble enough to admit my failure in this respect.
I do hope you have enjoyed this post. It's a bit different from normal, but I wanted to share my pleasure in this project with you.


  1. Very imaginative. You will have to be careful patting yourself on the back though. You did say you still have some tidying to do. At the same time, give yourself a couple of pats from me. You earned them.

  2. John, Very cool gates!!! I love the colors.:)

  3. Brilliant. You really would think it's a shed rather than three, ermmm four, gates.

  4. Now, that's clever!
    My shed now feels somewhat inferior as it is just a shed.
    Jane x

  5. well that has to be the coolest gate I have ever seen. Very creative and I like the milk bottle too

  6. Ah, I see you have an inventive mind. I'm glad yo explained about the milk bottle as I visualised an awful smell emanating from the it.

  7. Very creative, and the colors on those gates are vibrant.

  8. John you are a legend! Love your little stories ,I did wonder why an old milk bottle was there ,and I’m glad you explained that. Love ❤️ the colours btw, xx