Tuesday, 31 January 2017

My Right Buttock.

Yesterday, at Wickes in Littlehampton, ignoring the ‘elf ‘n’ safety notice telling me to ask for help I lifted three heavy bags of builder’s sand into my van. As I turned to lift the last one, I felt a sudden sharp pain in my right buttock.

As I drove home, favouring my left buttock on the seat the pain got worse. It felt as though I had twisted my right buttock muscle.

On arrival, back at home I consulted my extremely handsome son George Bsc, the recently qualified sports scientist.

“George,” I said to him, “I think I have twisted a buttock muscle.” I described the pain and how it had happened, “what do you think son?”

“Yes,” said George, “It sounds as though you have twisted a buttock muscle dad.”

“What can I do about it?” I asked him.

“Run it off dad, run it off.”

Today, despite not ‘running it off’ my right buttock has untwisted slightly and feels better, although my left buttock which has been burdened with more effort than normal does feel a bit painful.

The best thing to come out of this of course, is that my son's expensive education has not been wasted.


  1. Perhaps you should post a picture. If we can see it we might see something that EHS George Bsc missed. We certainly don't want to see you suffer.

  2. I have pains in the buttock which are caused by a spine problem. The chiropractor works wonders but I have to be careful about bending. Don't neglect it, John.