Me a married man too. I really should have known better. My poor long suffering wife! As if she did not have enough to put up with. Now this!
Believe me please when I tell you that I fought against it. Inside my head I was saying to myself, no, no, this is wrong. But, weak, unutterably foolish man that I am, I buckled. I gave in.
She was enchantingly beautiful. I had to have her. That is my only excuse. That very night, our first night together, I slept with her!
It was silly to sleep with her, I know that now, but she was such a tiny little piglet, the real runt of the litter, and I just didn't have the heart to leave her on her own. She was, after all, used to sleeping snuggled up with her siblings. Besides, there was plenty of room in her new sty, and the straw bedding was really most comfortable. To be honest, I had slept in worse places in my time, and with less agreeable companions!
That is how Petronella Pig came into my life. Luckily my wife was to fall under Petronella's spell also. Almost everyone did. Especially in her younger days. Piglets really are most adorable creatures. They certainly deserve a lot better than the hell hole I took her from!
Initially, I had gone to the farm that morning to look at a pickup truck which was for sale, and after declining to buy what turned out to be a bucket of rust, I could not resist a look into the pig pens.
It was heartbreaking to see these animals, especially the breeding sows, penned up, without even the room to turn around! Things have improved lately, I believe, but it will never be properly better until all farm animals have the freedom to express themselves with natural behaviour. I am not a vegetarian. This is just my opinion. But I am digressing.
The piglet I picked up was very small and thin. She had been given a chance, but was not, according to the pigman, progressing. She was very quiet as I held her, which was in sharp contrast to the others around me.
"What will happen to her?" I asked.
"I'll kill it today."
"Killed! No! Don't kill her! Can I have her?" I heard myself saying. "I'll give you twenty quid for her."
He was tempted, I could see that. "I could get sacked if I sold it to you," he said, eyeing up the two ten pound notes I was holding.
"I won't tell anyone, don't worry about that," I told him.
He looked about, furtively. Then taking the money from my hand, he began to walk off, "I'm not looking," he said.
So I stole the pig, and away did run!
She progressed just fine, once she had the opportunity to eat properly, and without being bullied by her brothers and sisters. In fact, she became the biggest sow I had ever seen, certainly living up to her breed name of 'Large White'. Blimey! She could eat. Nearly ate us out of house and home!
I never learnt my lesson though. Years later I bought Bluebell and Snowdrop, two Gloucester Old Spot pigs.
Never could resist a pretty face!