It's been ages hasn't it? But here I am still alive and kicking. I have been out of sorts since this heatwave began and of course me being a man I keep thinking the worst and expecting to kick the bucket at any minute. I am waiting for an appointment for a scan at the hospital. I have no idea how long that will be. I had two ECG's though and everything seems OK. So I try not to worry too much.I think what is making me feel so low apart from the heat is the ongoing saga about my childhood traumas. It does get to me all this harking back to the past. I thought my book would have seen the end of it but coincidentally the legal battles began shortly after. I phoned the survivors association recently and told them I didn't want to continue but they persuaded me to keep going for the sake of future children who might find themselves facing bad situations. So, on I go with it. The next step is seeing a psychiatrist. What difference that is going to make I have no idea. I mean, after all is said and done, I am certainly not the same person now as I was as a ten year old boy! But the other sides lawyers are insisting on it and I have had to release my medical records to them. I am feeling like a victim all over again. It is not easy but I think the beta-blocker tablets are helping to keep the anxiety at bay. It feels daft saying that but it is what it is.
On a happier note I have been busy making a new workshop for myself. It is made entirely from stuff I have had lying about the place and didn't cost me anything apart from a few nails. I am pleased with the result and have already completed a few projects. Here, -if I can find them- are some pictures for your perusal and delight. I say on a happier note but I don't want you to think I am terribly unhappy because I am not. I have my off days, but who doesn't? Nothing keeps me down for too long. I am a naturally happy person most of the time.
The weather was much cooler today and I went for a nice walk with Mia the German Shepherd. It was even nicer because my Extremely Handsome Son George came with us.
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| My extremely handsome son George helped me to put these heavy railway sleepers in place. |
Thank you for stopping by. I am glad you are still here with me despite the long break. I will be back soon to show you some of the stuff I have been making and restoring.
Dear John, So happy to see your post. This summer has been full of scans for me too, positron tomography, x-rays, biopsies etc. Went through the heart stuff 12 years ago; had the thing rebuilt etc., and I am only boy of 68. I know about the anxiety, the jumps and the dumps. Tell your doctor, even if it seems easily dismissible. As for your building project, I'll confine my admiration to a favorable "wow!"
ReplyDeletenice space! What's up with they psychiatrist? They think you are nuts? Of course you are, but that's what makes us like you!
ReplyDeleteToo bad the people running those places don't have to see a psychiatrist. Nothing like treating the victims like they are the guilty ones.
ReplyDeleteThe workshop looks good. It even has doors!
Make sure you drink lots of water. It helps. And I recently discovered vitamin D helps too.
Hope to hear from you in time to wish you a happy birthday in a few weeks.
I have missed your blogs. Chin up and cuddles for Mia
ReplyDeleteA past experience with a so called shrink with a relative left me thinking that they were more in need of help than she was. lol
ReplyDeleteJust be yourself and let them all get on with it.
As for the heat, well its enough to kill all of us mature people off, I'll be glad when it goes.
Workshop is a big hit.
Briony
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I don't enjoy the heat either, although I wish I was young enough to sunbathe. I hope things calm down for you soon and let you live your life in peace, doing what you want to do when you want to do it. I have given up worrying 'cause, like you, I keep thinking any day now...!
ReplyDeleteGod bless us oldies, eh?
You've made a good job of that, love the use of pallets. Looks fab.
ReplyDelete