It's Awfa Dreak Oot.

When the sun shines so do I. Today is cold, wet and bleak and so am I. It seems like every year I get fooled into thinking summer has arrived early but it lasts for a few days and back to winter. So disheartening!

It doesn't help that I have hurt my back again. This time it was caused by the simple act of bending to pick up Bonnie the Ginger Cat. Downward action was fine but as I straightened up something twisted. Agony! That was a couple of days ago. It is gradually hurting less now. It helps to keep moving but I don't feel like going out in this dreak weather.

I want to paint but I have run out of paints and can't afford to buy any. Yes, I am still poor at the moment. Hopefully soon I will be able to buy loads of the stuff.

Well, what a dismal post this has been so far. I do apologise.

My recent 'holiday' on the Isles of Scilly has got me thinking about bringing some modern comforts into my life. I think it is perhaps time I became a little less 'alternative'. How nice it was to be able to turn a light on with the flick of a switch. How marvellous to have hot water on tap and instant heat when the weather turns cold. Yes, it is time for a change. I have done quite well regarding my carbon footprint. Of course, I will always remain aware of my personal impact on the planet but perhaps a little less so.

Talking about carbon footprints I have been doing a bit extra by picking up litter on my walks with Mia the German Shepherd. Our usual walk over farmland is not a well trodden path but you would be amazed at the amount of plastic litter we come across. It is blown across the fields from the nearby villages and comes up against the hedgerows and fences. Our walk is looking much nicer now. The new Spring growth is now hiding a lot of litter but I will be back at the litter picking when it dies down in the winter.

Mia the German Shepherd stops to admire an Isles of Scilly view.

Ceiling Art And The Animal In Me.

I managed to survive my 'holiday' and only came home two days early! It is so good to be back home. I have been keeping myself busy with some spring cleaning since returning. I also rerouted the waste water pipe that has been a pain for ages.The door that has had a broken hinge for four years got mended and I also painted my bedroom ceiling. Not in a boring way though. I proper painted it. What do you think of it?

I have got some new bedding that is much more in keeping with the animal in me. Samantha came to check out the ceiling art and the new bedding. I think she likes it.

Looking tidy around here.

Scilly Work If You Can Get It.

It was about this time last year that Tricia my extremely Handsome Son George's mum told me how much it was going to cost to redecorate her holiday cottage on the Isles of Scilly.
"Flipping heck!" I said, "you can't pay that much for a bit of decorating. I will go over there and do it for you."
Hence, here I am one year later in the beautiful Isles of Scilly. Why didn't I keep my mouth shut? I hate decorating!

More about these beautiful islands here. www.visitislesofscilly.com/islands

I had two weeks to get the decorating done but such is my dislike of the job that I have got it done by working almost non-stop for the last five days. Absolutely blitzed my way through it just to get it done and out of the way.
Combine this almost non-stop decorating with the necessity to take Mia the German Shepherd for walks in the hills and this evening I find myself exhausted and ready to change my ticket home for an earlier date. I certainly do miss my humble homestead and I want to get on with building my workshop that I began shortly before I left.
This little house of Tricia's is quite delightful and the garden opens onto the beach. I like having enough electricity to switch things on without worrying that I might blow all the fuses. This happens at home where I only have a limited supply from an extension cable. And the bath here has constant hot water. I have had a bath every night. I love hot water on tap. I even enjoy washing the dishes here. I am sure if I had hot water on tap at home I would be very happy. I may look into the possibility of installing a back boiler when I get home? As I get older the 'simple' life is losing some of its appeal.
Tricia suggests I do nothing tomorrow and have a complete rest before making the decision about returning home early. I think I shall take her advice.
The decorating is finished. I have another week to go. Perhaps some leisurely walks and a boat trip or two to the outlying islands? Or maybe an early journey home? What am I like?
The weather forecasters are predicting a heatwave for the next few days. Tonight it is blowing a gale out there.
I am going to have a bath now. Seven baths in seven days. I hope I am not overdoing it?

Scilly allotments

These miniature plants have made themselves at home on a rock.

The 'Scillonian' sails daily in the Summer months.

Tricia's house.

A Common Experience.

It was about sixty eight years ago mum and maybe dad put me into the care of their (at that time) local council. I was placed into a residential children's home. I have written an ebook
about my time there. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Elbows-Table-John-Kennedy-Bain-ebook/dp/B00G2OF3XC 
It was an amazing co-incidence that at the time I was writing my book an association was being formed. An association of hundreds of people who had endured being in 'care' when they were kids. I use the word endure because that is what a lot of us had to do. The association use the word survivors. That is what so many children had to do. Survive and endure.
I know that many, many children who were not in care also had to endure and survive terrible childhoods. That sadly is still the case today but the difference with us survivors is that we were put into what should have been a place of safety. Of  'care'. And that is the difference. That word care.
The council did not give us care. They gave us abuse. Physical, sexual and mental abuse. They failed us. They failed in their duty of care.
The council have admitted -after a great deal of persuasion- liability for what some of us had to endure as kids. In fact what has happened is that every child who was in that place whether they suffered or not is to receive compensation. The amount is based on the length of time spent in that place. Even those who were there for just a week will receive some compensation. This is being called a common experience payment. For those of us who experienced the worst things this will be an interim payment. Next thing is a 'Harms Way' compensation. This has to be decided by a review panel composed- unjustly we survivors feel- by those who will be paying it, the council. We would have preferred an independent panel. But anyway, it is a miracle we have got this far. It has been a long fight for justice. Fought on behalf of us all by a few determined people.
I cannot go into how all this business of compensation has affected me, or how I feel about it all because to be perfectly honest I do not know. My mind is a maelstrom of thoughts and I cannot decipher my feelings. I do know that money cannot compensate me for what happened as a child and the subsequent results of that abuse which caused me to go off the rails and also to miss out on an education that I know I could have achieved something if I had not been so troubled and spent such a lot of my adult life feeling so useless and unworthy with a huge chip on my shoulder. But yes, I survived and today I try hard not to dwell too much on what might have been. Although the last few years have brought things to the fore in an unpleasant way causing me some inner turmoil and anxiety that I have to fight against.
For almost the first time in my life I shall soon be completely debt free. I will be able to pay the bank everything I owe them. I am really pleased about that. I am not sure that is all it should be about but I can't think any more about it. It took sixty eight years. I try hard to dismiss the perpetrators from my mind. My thoughts are with those kids who didn't survive the hell of a childhood in that place and took their own lives. There were many of them.

Tuba Skinny

This is Tuba Skinny my favourite band of all time. If  by some miracle I ever get to New Orleans I would hang about the streets until this lot turned up.
This is my favourite clip. I love how they welcome the man and his kazoo to join in.
The singer is Erika Lewis. I am smitten.
The cornet player is Shaye Cohn. Marvellous. I am smitten with her also.
I am indeed smitten with the whole band.
I hope you enjoy listening too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBINhDYXoEg