Wednesday, 14 February 2018

Swapping The Dog For A Budgie.

JB’s Vauxhall Astra update. Must be about number 30? Let’s call it 30a for clarity. (that’s a good word isn’t it?)

It’s done. The Astra. It’s ready. It’s a camper. Got the electrics sorted. Got me awning ready. I made some privacy screens too. I made them out of paper. Bloody stupid idea that. They are for the inside though. I'm not that daft! If the weather would improve I could be off on my travels tomorrow. I could…’cept having doubts now.
It’s small isn’t it, the Astra? Big enough for little ol’ me that’s not a problem. But Mia? The German Shepherd? She is bloody big! And it is always raining these days…and Mia has got this thick fur coat and when she gets wet… and the size of her paws! When her paws get wet they act like giant sponges and suck up puddles… and she comes indoors and shakes herself and it’s like a typhoon has hit!
Yeah, so doubts assail me all the time now. Assail? I don’t know where these words come from? I didn’t have much of an education. Good word though assail. I wonder what it means?
So, my plan is this: (that is a colon. A bit pretentious. I mean, who uses colons these days especially in the wrong place?) Get rid of Mia the German Shepherd. Yeah? No, bear with me, it’s not as heartless as it sounds. Get rid of Mia but provide a home for something smaller. A little rabbit perhaps? Or even better… a budgie? It could be a straight swap. It will save such a lot of hassle and wet towels. As you all know from bitter experience wet towels are a major cause of condensation in campervans. It’s a win win for the small creature and still gives me a bit of company.
I am sold on the idea already about swapping the dog for a budgie. There are other things in its favour too. With a budgie (not sure whether to get a boy budgie or a girl budgie but I can think about that later) its food takes up very little space and taking it for a walk would be a doddle. I can just tie a piece of string around one of its legs. Sorted.
Of course, none of this would be necessary if it would stop raining but it doesn’t look like it is going to any time soon. Do you think I would need to keep the budgie in a cage or should I let it fly free in the van? Mind you if it was flying about it would probably shit everywhere? I shall cage it. What grit would you use in the bottom of the cage? Have you got a budgie? What do budgies eat? Do they drink water or milk?
Thinking about it, budgies are a lot of hassle too. Maybe I should just stay at home with Mia the German Shepherd?
This rain is really getting to me.

No Mia that is my bed. Your bed is in the front.

I made some screens out of paper. Not a success.


  1. Definitely don't get the bird. They are messy little creatures. They can manage to expel everything from inside the cage to anything in a three foot radius. Mia will be fine as long as she can dry herself under the canopy before she gets back in the van.

  2. You could build an extension especially for Mia. Better than buying a budgie, don't you think?