Saturday 6 October 2012

Calm Down Ladies. Daniel Craig And Me. We Are Just Ordinary Blokes.

I am so flipping excited today. A money spinning opportunity has presented itself to me, and I cannot for the life of me think why I never thought of it before.

What has happened is: I was reading in the paper that Daniel Craig, the actor who plays James Bond, has sold his swimming trunks for, wait for it, £44.000. Yes really. I shall spell it for you in case you think I have written it down wrong. Forty four thousand pounds!

Do you know why they fetched so much money? Because they hadn't been washed. Amazing! Anyway it got me thinking. I love easy ways to make money

Personally I fail to see what all the fuss is about. He probably has an egg box down his trunks!
Unfortunately I only possess one pair of swimming trunks, and I don't really want to sell them, but what I do have in abundance, in a big pile on my bedroom floor is underpants, and the wonderful thing is, they are unwashed! Marvellous isn't it. Can you see where I'm heading with this?

Now I am not going to be greedy. I think if I charged perhaps in the region of twenty pounds per pair, I should do all right out of this venture. There are loads of dirty socks too. I think five pounds is a fair price for them. I shall have to charge for postage. Some of these items have been in that pile for a considerable time and I need to package them securely. I wouldn't want them escaping.

Well I must get on. I have to set up an online store to sell these things. Once I have that set up, all I have to do, is become a famous, good looking film star. No problem there that I can think of.

I will not bother to show you photos. The items in question are mainly grey and tattered. A bit like me really.





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10 comments:

  1. Geo.6 October 2012 at 19:00

    John, now I see why you have so many more followers than I. On the same day, you do a classy post about dirty underpants and I write one called "Snot". There's just no keeping up with you! My compliments.

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  2. kden6 October 2012 at 20:29

    Oooooo, as tempted as I am to purchase some of your fine ware I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to afford the postage. Sad really........

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  3. Emma Springfield6 October 2012 at 21:02

    See... I told you that you need an online store. But I will not say "I told you so".

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  4. diane b6 October 2012 at 22:42

    You are outrageous and hilarious.

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  5. Meanqueen7 October 2012 at 01:20

    I can't write down my first reaction to this post in case people get the wrong idea about me. Oh go on then......if you were female...... oh no I can't say that ;O))

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  6. Valerie7 October 2012 at 02:03

    I'm lost for words!

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  7. DEB7 October 2012 at 03:00

    I am sorry I will not be buying any of your much sought after undies (reg grundys - an Aussie TV exec that we name our undies after.) the reason I can't buy is that we have such strict bio-hazard restrictions at the Australian border, I'd sure to be locked up.

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  8. Eileen M7 October 2012 at 09:32

    Ha ha, you are so funny and I really need a laugh at the moment. Thanks.

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  9. Ann7 October 2012 at 12:03

    You do come up with the most splendid money making schemes. I won't be purchasing any of your underwear but I do wish you the best of luck :)

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  10. Anonymous13 October 2012 at 05:25

    I just discovered your blog. So you are only 65 years old. Wait a few years and you will be grumbling. Just thank what or who ever you believe in, that you have a brain that works, apparently very well. I have perused your blog site a bit but I shall return when I have more time. The Daniel Craig post was too funny.

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