Bosch Bish Bash Bosch!

Some potatoes will not go crispy! It doesn't matter what you do they will still be horribly squashy.

No please! Don't go telling me I'm doing it wrong. I not having that! I did them right. Oven preheated: Check. Potatoes parboiled: Check. Put in baking tray: Check. Roast until slightly burnt: Check.

The result was squashy not crispy. It has to be down to what type of potato is used. I have had some great results in the past, so I know what I'm talking about here.

Today's roast potatoes were so disappointing. I ate them, but the pleasure wasn't there.

I feel there are three options available to me. One: I can do some serious research on different varieties. Two: I can't remember what option two was going to be. Three: Can't remember that either.

Option two has just come back to me. It involves my trusty Bosch hot air paint stripper. That is more than capable of crisping a few potatoes. Come to think of it The Bosch hot air paint stripper would be a good way of softening hard butter!  I shall go and try that now. Please excuse me for a minute or two.

Yes success! It worked. I wasn't able to spread the butter, but it poured very easily! Caution: Do not do this if the butter is in a plastic container. I'm serious here. Put the butter to be melted into something that will not melt!

Incidentally while I am on the subject, thank you all for the hard butter spreading hints and tips. I'm sorry but the calendar prize for the best tip will not now happen. This is because I have just devised my own, far superior method. Sorry about that.

A quick and effective way to remove excess ear hair and melt earwax at the same time! Genius!

The Bosch hot air paint stripper is useful in so many ways. For instance, cold bed sheets can be quickly burnt warmed. If doing this while you are actually in the bed, remember to keep your legs as wide apart as possible. This will make a nice tent like structure to contain the heat. Caution: This method is not recommended for people with excessive flatulence. Also a good idea is to inform your spouse, lover or partner, whichever one of the three you are sharing with at the time, of what you are doing with the Bosch hot air paint stripper. Some uncaring people might see the wide open legs as an invitation to lewd behaviour. It goes without saying that if anything of this nature should occur, please remember to either switch off the Bosch hot air paint stripper, or ask a third party to hold it until you are finished. Caution: Do not ask an elderly parent to hold it.

Cold trousers? Don't risk shrinking your private parts. The Bosch hot air paint stripper will quickly heat them to a blissful temperature. Caution: Warm the trousers before putting them on not after! I am serious here. Hairy bits are easily singed. It just takes a moments inattention. Don't risk it. If you think waxing is painful, it is as nothing compared to the horror of burnt pubes. Seriously. Please do not risk it!

There are many different ways of utilising the Bosch hot air paint stripper. How many ways can you think of? Why not spend an enjoyable few hours thinking of some? A pleasant enough way to while away a cold winters evening.

I do apologise but I still cannot remember what option three was!