Sex, Love, And Animal Rights. Sadie The German Shepherds View.

He is in a right old strop this morning. Not much sleep last night. He blames me, but really it's Willard who should be blamed. Coming round here at all hours of the night, scratching at the door, doing that silly little bark of his, and howling like a lovelorn wolf. It's hardly my fault if Willard finds me irresistible at the moment.
Come to think of it it isn't even Willard's fault, he only wants to do what comes naturally. No, the fault here lies with humankind. What is Willard doing roaming around at night? He ought to be in bed.
Besides which it was John's decision to ground me. If he had let me sleep out in my kennel as normal, Willard and I could have enjoyed our romantic tryst, and he would have been none the wiser. No harm done, well not for a couple of months at least.

I'm quite sure the neighbours would rather put up with a bit of howling, instead of having to listen to the outrageous language which emanated from the wagon last night. According to John, Willard is a "scruffy, flea bitten, ******* mongrel. Which I agree he is. But I also find him roughishly attractive. John really ought to keep those nasty observations to himself. Especially if he wants to keep on portraying himself as a dog lover. Also, if he persists in using shoes as projectile missiles, then he thoroughly deserves to have them pee'd on. How would he feel having things thrown at him just because he wanted to do a bit of courting? Oh yes, sorry, there was that unfortunate incident. Anyway he should have asked the lady in question if she was married.
While I'm having a bit of a rant, I would like to point out that I always smell like this. After all, I am actually an outside dog. It is very bad mannered of John to keep referring to it. Having slept beside his bed last night I really think his unkind and thoughtless remarks, are truly a case of the pot calling the kennel black. Just because he lives alone is not in my opinion an excuse for letting his standards drop to the extent they have.
Anyway he should get a good nights sleep tonight, Willard is being kept in, there have been words. Hopefully he will wake up in a happier mood.
I'm going to have to spend another few nights indoors too. It's not fair, really it's not. Whatever happened to animal rights?